Emily in France 🇫🇷 Impossible N'est Pas Français
I still can't count to eight in French.
I've been French for just over three months. I've been living in France for 12 years. I've been claiming I'm fluent in French for 17 (more than half my life).
And while I've certainly deluded myself with regards to my French skills on a number of occasions, there are still a handful of things (eight, precisely), that I still can't do.
1. I cannot understand people when they talk to me on the phone. I just... can't. I have a hard time on the phone in English; in French, I just hope that I'm laughing in the right places.
2. I can't move quickly between u sounds. French has two of them: the low rounded ou in vous (which is the more similar of the two to the English oo), and the high rounded u in tu. And while I can distinguish between them, and even make both sounds quite easily (so I'm never accidentally saying beau cul – nice ass – instead of beaucoup – a lot), I do have a really hard time moving between them quickly. Saying pas du tout (not at all) is my kryptonite.
3. I still don't know when it's appropriate to ask someone to say tu instead of vous to them. I even wrote about it for the Wall Street Journal.
4. I can't do math in French. I just... no. (Though I did learn geometry in French, so for a while I called sines sinus.)
5. I can't understand most jeux de mots (purposeful double entendre). Which is a shame, because it's approximately 96 percent of French humor.
6. I can't understand the number 96 without about a 3-second delay.
7. I can't say the difference between je parlerais (I would talk) and je parlai (I talked) – or even really hear it.
8. I can't say the number eight. I avoid it at all costs. When I need eight of something, I ask for nine. I avoid doing anything at eight in the morning for this – and only this – reason.
Where I'm Eating
Circus Bakery has been getting quite a bit of attention of late, so the day of my naturalization, I decided I had to check it out for myself. The cinnamon buns were buttery, sweet, and beautiful – as promised. And the pizza (said the New Yorker of Italian descent) was, no hyperbole, the best I've ever had. Find out more on the blog.
As always, you can find my ever-evolving list of my favorite Paris restaurants here.
Where I'm Going
1. Well, first off, just for jealousy's sake... I'm going to Bordeaux this weekend. So that's fun. (Check out Instagram if you'd like to imbibe vicariously through me).
2. The Porte Dorée is hosting a festival against racism and antisemitism, which I'm definitely going to be attending.
3. Les Résidents is a restaurant without a chef. Instead, it invites a new cook to take over the helm every so often for a "residence," and I'm super excited to visit while Kirsten Shaw is in charge!
What I'm Writing
1. Mimolette stands out for its bright orange color and lunar surface, and some sources say it was actually invented to spite the Dutch. I delved into this legend for USA Today.
2. Omelettes might seem like an easy thing to master, but in France, the technique to make them is extremely precise. I asked several French chefs for their secrets for Food & Wine.
3. Love pastry? Then you'll love this roundup of some of my favorite pastry shops in Paris for Fodor's.
What I'm Reading
I've always been drawn to the idea of walking the Camino de Santiago de Compostela. I even saw a bit of it while I was living in San Sebastian. But after reading this account, I'm even more drawn to the idea of doing the full trek – and possibly all on my own. Check out my full review.
A bientôt !
Emily in France